"God didn’t want me to wait until Ben was sober, until he got a job, until he washed his hands, or until I thought he was “worth loving.” No. God wanted me to love the unlovable, even when it was hard for me to see if it was justifiable by my own standards."
Thoughts from January 26th, 2016 at 9:38pm:
I was driving home from work and I knew I had a couple of things to pick up at the store before dinner. I was already running late from work and was frustrated that my schedule wasn’t going as planned. Interruptions bother me.
I stopped at Walmart and there was a homeless veteran sitting outside by the door. We exchanged names, I shook his hand, and I asked him, “Ben, if you could have one thing from the grocery store, what would it be?” He said he wanted a protein shake. I smiled and said I would be right back. My heart suddenly “had time” for compassion when I realized my pre-determined schedule was quite laughable.
I walked into the store and a young woman about 25 years old came up behind me and said “Wow, I have never seen anything like that before. Can I come with you and buy him a shake too?” I was giddy! I walked around the whole store with my new friend Jessie looking for protein shakes and making small talk about what was going on in our lives. We bought the shakes and went our separate ways, understanding that a simple gesture of kindness goes deeper than we think.
I went back outside and gave him the shake, a pack of gum, and a Milky Way - because seriously, Milky Ways are straight from the Lord. I immediately smelt his breath and knew that he had been drinking a lot more than he should have. He kept saying, “Wow, you are so beautiful. I just love you!” I was expecting Him to be thankful that I would go out of my way to bless him. My heart sunk to the floor and I began to think of all the phrases I’ve heard when it comes to this kind of stuff. “Watch out, they are just lazy and looking for handouts. You are just enabling them in this lifestyle when you give to them. He is just a drunk over-dramatizing his circumstances.”
I realized in that moment that my love for others had been contingent on what they can give back to me. My love for others has been defined by this mindset for far too long. Compassion looks nothing like sympathy, and is not moved by thinking others need you. Loving others is never dependent on if they are willing to steward what you bless them with.
God didn’t want me to wait until Ben was sober, until he got a job, until he washed his hands, or until I thought he was “worth loving.” No. God wanted me to love the unlovable, even when it was hard for me to see if it was justifiable by my own standards. Because it was never about me in the first place. Love gives without expecting anything in return. Love can walk into a room and say “I love you” without expecting to hear it back.
Our God is never afraid to get his hands dirty. He doesn’t love people at a distance. He gets involved in our messes. He doesn’t wait to freely give his blessings to us, and he never expects anything in return. I want a heart like Jesus. Even if His people never respond, He gives it all. He gives His whole heart. He risked it all, fully knowing that the very people He created to love would say no. True love risks everything and expects absolutely nothing in return, because love is unconditional.
I was driving home from work and I knew I had a couple of things to pick up at the store before dinner. I was already running late from work and was frustrated that my schedule wasn’t going as planned. Interruptions bother me.
I stopped at Walmart and there was a homeless veteran sitting outside by the door. We exchanged names, I shook his hand, and I asked him, “Ben, if you could have one thing from the grocery store, what would it be?” He said he wanted a protein shake. I smiled and said I would be right back. My heart suddenly “had time” for compassion when I realized my pre-determined schedule was quite laughable.
I walked into the store and a young woman about 25 years old came up behind me and said “Wow, I have never seen anything like that before. Can I come with you and buy him a shake too?” I was giddy! I walked around the whole store with my new friend Jessie looking for protein shakes and making small talk about what was going on in our lives. We bought the shakes and went our separate ways, understanding that a simple gesture of kindness goes deeper than we think.
I went back outside and gave him the shake, a pack of gum, and a Milky Way - because seriously, Milky Ways are straight from the Lord. I immediately smelt his breath and knew that he had been drinking a lot more than he should have. He kept saying, “Wow, you are so beautiful. I just love you!” I was expecting Him to be thankful that I would go out of my way to bless him. My heart sunk to the floor and I began to think of all the phrases I’ve heard when it comes to this kind of stuff. “Watch out, they are just lazy and looking for handouts. You are just enabling them in this lifestyle when you give to them. He is just a drunk over-dramatizing his circumstances.”
I realized in that moment that my love for others had been contingent on what they can give back to me. My love for others has been defined by this mindset for far too long. Compassion looks nothing like sympathy, and is not moved by thinking others need you. Loving others is never dependent on if they are willing to steward what you bless them with.
God didn’t want me to wait until Ben was sober, until he got a job, until he washed his hands, or until I thought he was “worth loving.” No. God wanted me to love the unlovable, even when it was hard for me to see if it was justifiable by my own standards. Because it was never about me in the first place. Love gives without expecting anything in return. Love can walk into a room and say “I love you” without expecting to hear it back.
Our God is never afraid to get his hands dirty. He doesn’t love people at a distance. He gets involved in our messes. He doesn’t wait to freely give his blessings to us, and he never expects anything in return. I want a heart like Jesus. Even if His people never respond, He gives it all. He gives His whole heart. He risked it all, fully knowing that the very people He created to love would say no. True love risks everything and expects absolutely nothing in return, because love is unconditional.